User:Dark-EnigmaXIII/Speech


 * Good old DTN was right. Veteran, Im sorry for what I said to you. I was a prideful fucking cunt indeed. Now, however, I reached a point where I understand you. Im not comparing myself to you, no, no, no. You were way better than I am, but if no one mind, Im quoting you, and using your format.


 * And if someone dont like it, I dont care, so fuck off.

I. Purpose
 * I, too, used to be productive. I used to rewrite a page per day, fight vandals, welcome newbies, and make renders. But no, those days are gone. Those days are gone and it seems they are never coming back! I’m an admin. I’m an admin because someone thought I would lead this place into a fansite and no one else was available. I know, I was just picked because the staff of that time just wanted the responsability off their backs, and I was eager to take it. I failed miserably at accomplishing what my "suggestor", so to speak, wanted me to archive in its place. In the end, I made a wiki. An Encyclopedia. Some may say that the term "made" its hypocritical, since this was build over the work of the old community. Have I done a good job with a encyclopedia? I hope so. I dont know. It doesnt matter anymore. I don’t help the wiki. I hardly edit. I hardly contribute. I just lurk the Recent Changes trying to feel good about myself.


 * So why am I still here? Is it so that I can "brainwash" users into following my policies? Is it so I can keep a community that used to be united... separated? It is so I can declare a war against the people I used to admire? Yes, people, I admire the work that KrytenKoro, DoorToNothigness, Neummannz, and everyone else made here. Give me the chance and I would stop the fork from happening in the first place, since that was the moment where everything just went down to hell. So, in the end... Why am I here? probably so that I can continue to feel the guilt of being a non-retired crat whilst hardly doing any work for this wiki.


 * There are times when... I really dont know. I feel like a parasite. Some may say that I've archived a lot. That this wiki would exist like this without me. I, on the other side... feel like if all I ever did was beign the epicented of a cold wiki war. No one admits it, but the war existed. Like Americans and Russians, we've been racing each others to get the best things and be the first on everything. Sometimes this really gets to me. Enough for me to take relieve in a fantasy of the community remerged here at wikia, because, of course, I favor this adress more than I favor khwiki.net. Why? Technical stuff that I allowed to blind me. It is disgusting... I know Im just stoping all this because I fear that I will become even more useless in a merged site. Honestly, I dont want to lose my power... I feel I've done enough to validate it, even if it was archived in such a silly way. But I want to keep it. Why? Because Im a prideful fucking cunt. Even if Im moved to retire, I want to be able to SOMEDAY come back... Am I a jerk? Of course I am. Kryten demotes himself personally and I cling to my power. Why do I do it? So someday I can be useful again. Maybe just wishful thinking.

'''II. Dedication'''
 * I don’t have it. I used to have it, and now I don’t. What am I dedicated towards? Hmmm, let’s see... College, work, drawing, 3D modeling... Hell, Im lying, Im not even dedicated to that anymore. I feel like if I have lots of free time... and nothing to apply it into. And any attempts at doing so would innevitably bring me back to this wiki.


 * There are new people coming in with dedication. There are forums just for speculation on the upcoming 3DS game, those alone show me that editors care about this place and the series. The wiki is still in good hands. It doesnt need me anymore... perhaps it did in the past, even though I doubt it. In fact, I believe that should I never raised in power, right now, this places would be khwiki.net feeding source.


 * Alright, as he said it: Okay, these two sections are pointless monologuing. Let’s get to the meat of things.

'''III. Regrets'''
 * I didnt deserve a hate club like the DTN Hate Club. Im not saying I was an angel. Im just saying I wasnt worth it. Due to beign a despicable piece of shit that tried to "do things right". I had good intentions, I swear... but I made countless of mistakes that I am regretting. And you know? The worst things in history were made with good intentions.


 * http://pastebin.com/NyJkAU1j


 * That log. What I said there about DTN, and I probably said many times before. And I regret it. I claimed to be open to all. I claimed to respect all. And I go ahead and say that I explicity dislike one of the few editors that left their marks forever in the history of this wiki. I am probably but an ant compared to him. Why I said it? Probably because I was reflecting. He was innactive. I was innactive... I was reflecting on him. I dont deserve my staff position anymore, and in a desperate attempt to hold onto it, I tried to make others look a worse than me. And I regret it. I regretted it the very night I was informed of his retirement. I did had reasons to dislike him. C'mon, DTN, you were nothing close to perfect. I disliked you. I loathed your work ethic. But still, I respect you for all you did. And I apologized again to both Neummanz and KrytenKoro, for I stripped them from their collegue and friend. I trembled at the very moment Soxra mentioned leaving the wiki to me. I cannot imagine the rage you both felt against me, and I can say, its justified. Im sorry for stripping a friend from your side.


 * There are many more regrets I have. The oldest oneI can think of beign... what I did to this site. And of course, what I did here affected khwiki.net and their plans. I am 100% responsable for all that happened since the split. Dont blame Sox. He's a good boy. He just supported me, and remained by my said. Soxxeh, you're the best, and most loyal partner I could have ever wanted. And he is not to blame, because as you all acussed me of already, I was calling the shots. I get it, without me the plan would have worked. Everyone who think so are free to say it.


 * I've probably did other awful things that I cannot... recall, or dont want to. I dunno. Im sorry if I did. It might not be a consolation, but I was trying to do things right.

'''IV. Martyrship?'''


 * No. Fucking. No. Classifying myself as a martyr is insane, because I am not. DTN wasnt, and he left forever. Im actually just leaving for a week, and you all probably didnt realized that I said that "We would meet again". I cant leave the wiki, no matter wich one, just yet. At least not until I see things trough properly. I'll decide after that. I'll tell you all one thing: Stop the hate. Just.... stop it. Would there really be a benefit if we start reverting the edits we've done? Would it be helpful for us all if out of the blue we start stalking the upload logs and marking images for deletetion again? What profit is in that, for ANY side? Just today, 2 users that claimed to edit on both wikis decided to cut any connection with us, and one of out editors went MIA tired of the drama. Hell, I was supposed to be inactive when someone opened my eyes that I need to be a good admin. I wont let all of you down now. I dont know if the plan would work. If it doesnt, I dont know if we would be able to survive as a wiki completely alive. It's just a giant gamble.


 * BUT


 * There's one thing I know for sure: You need to stop following my decision like if it was law. You need to make this decision with your head. This merge can work as much as it can fail. And hell, if it work it would be SOOOOOOOOOOOO awesome! Im dying to be able to work witj Kryten and Neummanz, As if!, The_Inexistent, Erry, ShardofTruth... Some of you might be unfamiliar with the names, and that's alright. PRecisely because you are unfamiliar with them, give them a change. We can hold off this merge and give you ALL time to go and work in .net for a while. Get to know them. They are all wonderful persons and legends of this wiki. I want to learn from them, help them, and perhaps teach them a few things. I was asked to be diplomatic. Is this beign diplomatic? I dunno, I hope so, and if it isnt, I just suck! But really, all of you, trust me: They are not as evil you think. Not even in the slightlest. If you still dont want to merge, that's perfectly fine with me. Just make sure that you're doing it of your OWN volition. And even if we dont merge, I invite you all to still go to .net and meet these guys. You will not regret it.

V. Conclusion


 * That's it. I had a short break, uh? An hour or so. Please, all of you, in the behalf of both wikis, make your chooices with your own heads. Stop this nonsense. Stop the paranoia. Good lord... just stop the drama. I've always been proud of my community for beign friendly. Even if you dont know them, be friendly with them. Dont listen to anyone's rant. If you head somenthing bad from my mouth, then ignore me, I was beign a jerk. I want this drama to end one way or another, hopefully without the wikis entering in a period of hostility, regardless of merge or not. But both the merge, and the possible hostility depends on all of you as much as it depends on me, and even more. Please, let us be friends again. Regardless of the wiki status, let us BE friends.


 * This is the end of my rant. It is not meant as an offense to DTN, but as an apology and more.


 * Again, Kryten, Neummannz, I also apology to you two.


 * Also, this is too long to be on a forum, hence its in my userpage.


 * I love you all. You all, regardless of the URL, are fucking awesome people.